I’m Hank Green, and my last meal would be avocado boba tea and a sweet bean bun, a catfish po’ boy and Sazerac, a fancy corn dog with chipotle mayo, lasagna, black tea, candied salmon, a warm chocolate chip cookie, and a coffee peanut butter milkshake for dessert. ((Intro Music)) Every person has exactly two things in common. We all gotta eat and we’re all gonna die. Today we’re joined by science communicator, novelist, sock connoisseur, and prolific pisser of cancer. Hank Green, welcome to the show. It’s a pleasure to be here. Thank you very much. I’m very excited about food right now. I am excited that you’re excited. You’re like costar to the food. I hope you know. Not even costar. I’m like merely the usher, just shoveling the food towards you and getting the scraps that I can. Food usher. Yes. I feel like there’s an elephant in the room that we have to address, which is the title of the video. Uh huh. That many people are going to think that you are dying. I’m not. No, I assume they get the format, but I don’t know. But you’re currently only dying about as much as I’m dying. Theoretically. That’s the idea. Which one of us do you think is currently dying more? Me, for sure. I’ve seen your body. The insides are rotten. The outside of the apple is great. You take a bite and it is just completely molded. Okay, I believe you. Yeah, no, I mean, the, where I’m at right now is, I’ve been in remission for about this long. And that’s great. And basically they call you cured at five years. So I got a while before I can, like, have the big, biggest celebration. But it’s pretty unlikely that it will come back. Have you ever thought about your last meal before? You don’t know. Not until, I mean, not until I thought, oh, I could probably, maybe I could be on that show. And then I was thinking a lot about it. This is a stupid question. How much have you thought about death? Oh, a bunch now. Yeah. I’ve sort of, you know, through life, thought about it very abstractly for a long time and I, I was like, here’s probably what it’s gonna feel like if I have to confront that. And I was totally wrong. If you have a chance to confront your mortality, I suggest you don’t do it, if you can avoid it. It’s just, yeah. It’s like, it’s a whole set of things, but I definitely learned stuff about myself that I didn’t know, and that are definitely true. And, that’s good to know true things, but I don’t know, I feel like I could have learned them a little later. It’s a lot, yeah. There were, early on in the process, before we knew what kind of cancer I had, there were some times when I, it was like, you know, there’s like, a shocking number of practicalities, to it. So it was sort of thinking about that stuff, and then also like, finding out what I actually feel like I’m gonna miss out on. Which I was, at the, you know, I’m like a science guy. Before I was sick, I was like, I’m gonna, like, it’d suck if I died before there were people on Mars. Like, I won’t get to see what A.I. does, you know, see our weird robot apocalypse future. Whatever it is. But that didn’t bother me at all, when I was actually thinking about maybe dying. I was, it was all family and friends stuff. You ready to eat? Oh yeah! Let’s do it! This is going to be a weird sign curve here. But I will absolutely eat food. ((Bells Ringing)) Alright Hank, for the first course of your last meal, we have sweet red bean buns. These are actually from a spot called IXLB DimSum Eats, fantastic, they make them better than we could at home. And then we have made our own avocado milk tea boba. Tell me about it, how’d this end up on your last meal? The first time I ever had boba tea I was on tour, it was like the first time I ever like performed music on tour with a band. And like, that’s such a weird thing to get to do in your life. People in my band, like the folks who, and they’d been touring musicians for a long time, and so they’d been all over America, and they’d done, like, when you’re touring, you, like, just, like, it’s very good to get a moment where you stop and enjoy something, and so they knew all these weird places to go eat, and we stopped at this, literally, like, you could say a hole in the wall, but it wasn’t like a crappy place, but it was a hole in the wall. Like, it was like you walked up to a counter that was downtown, and like, you could not go inside. So you, and they like had bánh mì sandwiches, and boba tea, and I was like, I wanna get a weird, like, what’s the weirdest boba flavor I could get? And it was avocado. That’s incredible, please dig in. Okay, yes, and I also have a bean paste story. Well, one at a time, come on. Have some decorum. Oh, my gosh. That’s better than Chicago hole in the wall. And you get that little, if you think about it, you’re like, ooh, is that guac on the back of my palate? Tell me about your red bean story. Well, I grew up in Orlando, Florida, where there’s a lot of, just, a large Asian population, and, and me and my friends would go to like, weird little restaurants. And order things that we wouldn’t normally eat. Cause it was like, let’s try to be different in the world. Like, let’s try, like, see what the world is like when you’re not just eating, you know, meatloaf and mashed potatoes. And, bean, bean isn’t dessert. Is the thought, you know? And you’re like, okay, I’ll try bean dessert. And, I was making my own choices. And I was like, seeing the world. And having control over it, and agency, and like, being able to explore. That’s incredible. Please, dig in. I love that I just get to eat food. Oh, they’re so soft. Man. Where does that innate sense of curiosity come from? I really think I was born that way, man. I think we all are. What do you think quashes it within people, then? I think that that’s the big thing. People often ask me, like, how do you, like, help a kid get into science? And I’m like, you listen when they ask. And instead of saying, I don’t know, you say, like, let’s find out. You know, like, let’s go through the process together, because I don’t know either, or, even if you do think you know, like, to like, show the child the process of like, exploring. Even if it’s just like, on Wikipedia, you know. Yeah, I’m at the age where I’m like, thinking about having kids, and I’m incredibly scared of having kids, because I think that anything I try and model for them, they’re going to completely rebel against. You don’t know. And here’s the thing, my dad was so good at this. That like, whatever I was up to, he was like, that’s probably interesting, so I should check it out too. Especially, even if he’d never been exposed to it. You know, like suddenly my dad’s a Nine Inch Nails fan, you know? You know, he’s like, this is actually some really interesting music. I’m like, that’s not what it’s about, dad! You’re not supposed to be into this! I’m supposed to be in, I mean, you’re supposed to hate it so I can like it! Trent Reznor’s mine, dad! He’s my best friend, you can’t have him! What’s the best part of having cancer? People do stuff for you. That sounds rad. You, like, and they have to, or they’re a bad person. When I think of Hank Green, I think of weaponizing guilt, so this is very much on brand for you. No, it’s like, it’s not. It’s good, like, it, I think that people want to do stuff for, for you when you need help. And so it’s good to like, have a moment where you know you need help. We don’t need to be seriously ill to ask for a favor from a friend, right? Like, let’s have that be our world. Like, if you ask for a favor from somebody, they come over and bring you a latte that you can’t go get yourself. They’re just having latte with a friend. It’s not like, it’s not like they’re like, oh boy, I had to do that. It’s like, oh, we’re, like, I’m having a pleasant time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just like, put them on the calendar, even if they don’t know it. Just like, four days from now, just say like, oh, I’m gonna text this person this day, or I’m gonna like, be in their neighborhood and text and say, hey, I’m nearby, do you want anything or? Cause if you don’t put it on the calendar, you know, there’s a million things you have to figure out how to decide. You have to figure out how to prioritize the things that really matter. But like, when the world is sort of like, bombarding you with distractions, you end up forgetting to. I imagine a lot of people have given you praise for, quote, remaining positive in the face of your diagnosis. And one of my favorite art pieces, this is going somewhere, but you gotta sit for a second, is René Magritte’s Treachery of Images. Ceci n’est pas une pipe. It’s a picture of a pipe, but he’s saying this ain’t a pipe. You can’t smoke it, you can’t stuff it. It has nothing in common with a pipe, it’s merely an image. It’s kind of the way that I have digested a lot of YouTubers specifically. This is a representation of a person that’s curated, and it can’t possibly see the whole picture of that. Yeah. And of course I recognize the paradox of all of these cameras. Thank you, cam ops. There’s cameras? Dylan, you’re the best. You’re my number one cam op in the whole group. Taylor, watch your ass. Winnie. Anyways, I recognize the paradox, but like behind the scenes, after you turned the camera off, what were your real emotions? Were they similar to on camera? I’ve always had comfort in the feeling that, like, what I show people is me, but it’s not all of me. Sure. So, like, yeah. I was like that sometimes. And sometimes I wasn’t. You know, being sick, like, is bad because it hurts. Like, it is physically uncomfortable. And the not knowing when it’s gonna end, or not knowing if it’s normal, so there’s like a fear component to it. Whereas, like, the existential stuff, like, I was completely unpredictable and I didn’t know when it was gonna hit and not hit, and, like, there were absolutely times where I was just, like, living my life, having a good time, and I felt, but I, like, felt bad, and that made it kind of hard, but then there were times when I was feeling okay, but, like, the brain parts were making it so that I couldn’t have a good time, and so, like, even in the times when I felt, physically really horrible, there were There were laughs, you know. I remember during your initial video, the I Have Cancer, you made a joke that actually made me tear up. That was, watching the medical system move so quickly was disconcerting. It was like seeing a horse with hands and Hank a single tear drop down my hardened little cheek on that moment. So, the positivity, it was genuinely inspirational. Yeah, and it was weird. It was like, wait, it’s been three days and I’ve had like, Twelve doctor’s appointments. Twilight Zone episode, something is amiss. Something is wrong. There’s something on the wing of the plane. Everybody’s saying that it might not be cancer, but they’re acting like it is. You ready for course number two? I’m ready for course number two. Let’s do it. Alright. ((Bells Ringing)) – [Josh] Hank, for course number two, we have a fried catfish po’ boy. Catfish has been marinated in buttermilk, a little bit of hot sauce, Tony Chachere’s seasoning overnight. A little bit of remoulade spread on the po’ boy roll. This is taken from a New Orleans bakery called Orleans & York. They do great work. A little bit of “shred-us”, tomato on there. And then we have a classic Sazerac cocktail. This is made with Sazerac, rye whiskey, a rinse of Pernod absinthe, a lemon twist, and then some Peychaud’s Bitters to round it all out. Yeah. Yeah, this is exciting. I love this stuff, man. Yeah, I mean, I don’t feel like it’s super traditional. Like, they’re both New Orleans dishes. But I don’t know if they generally go together, but hell, I mean, I will do it. I found everything goes together in New Orleans, which is great. Yeah. I don’t drink a lot, at all, and I drink less now. But like, it’s the closest thing you have to like a magic potion. Like somebody making like a real weird cocktail. I love that. And I love liquids. I, same. I expected more words. Sometimes more words come after a word, but not that time. And that’s fine. No, but I, I like, I love, I love, I like, I love juice. I love Coca-Cola. I love boba tea. I love tea. I love coffee. Like it’s, I don’t know if we think about it, but like this, it’s kind of a, it’s kind of a weird thing cause most of those things don’t have a lot of nutrition in them. Or any nutrition, they have, food. Like there’s sugar. It just seems very human to me. Yeah. And I feel similarly about sauces, which is a big deal with a po’ boy. And a sauce is kind of like, it’s kind of like a drink that you put on food. Yes. What did I say right when the cameras turned off? I said if I have a liquid next to a solid, I just want to put them in the thing. I want to French dip that catfish po’ boy into that Sazerac. Cheers. Let’s not do it. I think this is where I draw the line. Oh, hell yeah. It does taste like magic. It does taste like magic. Dig in to the po’ boy, it’s getting cold, it’s getting cold. Oh, oh, oh. That bread is so crunchy. Where’s that from? Orleans & York Bakery. So it’s a proper, like, New Orleans style French loaf. Yeah, it’s perfect. It’s really nice. You made a video of making Elf spaghetti and talking about death, which, for me, is kind of the full circle of. You want to explain what Elf spaghetti is? Oh, please. Elf spaghetti, Will Ferrell in the movie Elf, makes his ideal spaghetti, which I believe is just a pile of noodles not finished in the sauce, which is my only problem with it. Covered in, I believe it was like marshmallows, M&M’s, chocolate sauce, caramel sauce, and then finished with maple syrup on top as if it were a fine pecorino romano. And you made that, and then you were musing on death. You said a quote that meant a lot to me. You said, I realized I very much wanted to be alive for as long as possible, if only because things are interesting, and I wanted to keep seeing them. Is that about as close as we can get to finding a meaning of life? And then he goes for more po’ boy. And he’s just like, what’s the meaning of life, Hank? It helps, it helps the, it helps the existentialism go down. Did you taste the Creole mustard in the remoulade? I do. I do also want a little hot sauce though. Hey, can we bring some hot sauce? Navya. Just like the simplest cayenne if you can find it. We have a couple, we have Tony’s Chachere’s hot sauce, we got, Red Rooster in our bottom drawer. Oh wow, that’s so much. Yeah, Hank, you can also go pick your own. Yeah, big, big. The red cap on the far left, right in the front. Wait, oh, there’s Crystal, Crystal. Yeah. No, not that, oh, this one’s fun though. This is, no, no, bring it, bring it, bring it. Thank you. But also, wait, go back, go back. Have you had this? No, I haven’t. So this is, made from the datil pepper, which they say is the oldest pepper grown in the Americas. No, no, no, yeah, can you go back? Is there Crystal? Wait, no, no, can you, can you open the fridge again? There’s a bottle of Crystal. It’s actually on the second drawer next to the pickles. The second one up. I think it might be unopened. We got a virgin bottle of Crystal. That’s tasty. Very sweet. Yeah, right? Is St. Augustine’s that far from Orlando? It’s Florida. Like, it’s like, I don’t know. It’s a drive. Yeah, it’s like in. This. This. This. This. Okay. Wait, can you pass me the other one, though? Thank you. So, I think you and I have a very similar relationship to sauce. Yeah. Because that’s exactly. Wait, no, come on, come on. Stop bogarting the sauce. You were saying, no, no, eat, eat, eat. Right? Yeah. Yeah, there it is. What did I say about life? Oh, it’s just me. It’s just, it’s just me. I like I, like what I, when I was sick and I was trying to like, you know, just do something, you’re bored because you feel so bad, that like, I felt like I was still good at my job, which was like telling people about how the world is weird. And then I was still good at the part where I was like trying to figure out why the world is weird. And you can look too hard, I think sometimes, but if you look too hard, it can become a problem. And so like, to just like listen to your brain being like, yeah, I like that. And it’s like, what’s unhealthy about this? Like, if it’s, you know, having six Sazeracs a day, like, that’s not good. But if it’s like, just being super interested in, like, how, like, red pandas work, I’m like, there’s nothing bad about that. Like, I’m, like, only good is happening as I’m figuring that out or consuming that content. When you got diagnosed, one of your fears was cancer taking over your identity that you were now going to be known as anxiety sickness guy as opposed to fun goofy science guy. Do you still think there’s time to pivot your identity to number one Dave Matthews hater? I don’t even know how I feel about Dave Matthews. What’s the worst thing you’ve ever said about Dave Matthews? Dave deserves to know. Probably not something, probably pretty mean. When I was in high school, the people that didn’t like me liked Dave Matthews. So it didn’t have anything to do with Dave. You know, high school’s tough. Sure. And we all find our identities. Those people found their identity in Dave Matthews and hating me. So, I have my identity in hating Dave Matthews and them. No, the reason I know that, do you know the reason I know that? Do you know the piece of media? It was the first piece of media that I ever heard you on. Oh wow. It was a podcast, called Conversations with People Who Hate Me. Oh yeah! Dylan Marron, where there was a, person who had commented, I hate Hank Green, and then they got them on the line with you to explain why. Yeah, absolutely wild. That meant a lot to me. I had just started out on YouTube, and I had just started receiving abuse. Sure. And so, your interaction there, showing your empathy and general goodness and also showing empathy for the person who said that they hate you, meant a lot to me. It really helps. Like, they’re, like, we just need to engage in activities that turn the temperature down. They don’t think I’m gonna see it, but you see it. You see it, you see a lot more. And Dave Matthews never saw it. Like, what we said about Dave Matthews in the privacy of my friend’s home, did not, had no chance of escaping. To reach Dave, and now, easy peasy, just make it a TikTok and it’s gonna hit him. It would hit him faster than the 800 pounds of human feces coming out of his tour bus hit those people in that Chicago River cruise, am I right? Yeah, I remember that! That’s, that’s a thing that happened. I didn’t have that planned to say, I just remembered that that was a thing that happened, and now we’re here. Now we’re here. I think Dave Matthews is great. Dave, if you’re watching, you should come on the show. It’s not my show. No, Hank is gonna host the next episode and cook. You’re gonna have a lovely soup. Yeah, whatever it is, I bet Dave Matthews would love this. Dave Matthews would, I know Dave Matthews would love this. But that’s not what your, the question was. Why do you? Oh, before I even mentioned Dave Matthews, you’re right, your identity as cancer guy as opposed to fun, goofy, science guy. Yeah. What I realized really quick is I was like, actually, I do want to be the cancer guy. – I would like. – Interesting. But I could be the fun, goofy, science, cancer guy, whereas like, what’s cancer? And how does cancer treatment work? And what’s happen like, I’m the story now. It’s cancer, like, science is happening in me right now. And then cancer treatment was a, like, science happening in my body, and like, being me, I was able to like, look at the history of the treatments I was taking, understand where they came from, how, like, why, you know, like, why I was doing the treatments I was doing as opposed to what I would do if my treatments weren’t working or if I was having adverse effects to them. Like, understanding the different paths that people who have my particular cancer take. Understanding that cancers are all very different from each other. Understanding how chemotherapy works, how radiation works. Like, how they decide how much chemo to give you. And how worried should I be that they’re giving me too much or not enough? And in some ways I’m like a great patient, in some ways I’m a nightmare patient, because I’m like, doctor, I don’t know if I feel good about the statistical analysis in the German Hopkins study group study, because they, there’s no statistical difference between this and this, or this and this, but they didn’t test whether there’s a statistical difference between this and this. And he’s like, yeah, no, that’s true. ((Laughing)) Do you want it or not? When I first found out about your diagnosis, my first little intrusive thought was just, oh, this is the best guy to get cancer for that exact reason that I know your curiosity and your ability to communicate. Being curious, like, it’s, I don’t think it’s for everybody but being curious about it was actually really helpful to me, and I have some other friends. I have a friend who is also does science YouTube videos, who, went through his own cancer journey a few years ago. So, it was very nice to have him as a friend He said the same thing. He was like just like getting a chance to, you know, have a really good reason to do really in depth research on a really interesting topic. Is cool. And I’m like, oh. I mean, I guess it’s kind of terrifying, but I’m glad it’s also cool. ((Bells Ringing)) – [Josh] Hank, for your next course. We have quote unquote fancy corn dog. – [Hank] Yeah. – [Josh] This is a Wagyu beef hot dog from Snake River Farms, it’s my favorite hot dog on the planet. And then, we have wrapped that in a cornmeal batter with a little bit of truffle honey and a little bit of saffron in there. – [Hank] Okay. – [Josh] And then double fried it, served with a chipotle mayo from scratch, of course, and then we have. – [Hank] Double fried is how corn dogs work! – [Josh] It, yeah! It’s how you gotta do it! That’s how you gotta do it! You gotta set it, and then it rests, and then you get that extra, crispy coating on top, a little bit of moisture seeps out of there. Yeah. – [Josh] Gotta do it. And then we have lasagna with, quote, lots of layers. – [Hank] Yeah! We fit 11 in there, which I hope constitutes a lot. That’s more than 11! I’m looking at it. That’s, like, I don’t know. Count, boy. One, two, three! No, I think you’re seeing fractures of noodles. You know what’s funny? Lily told me it was 11. Lily made this lasagna, and it looks great. She told me it was 11, and then I said, I’m gonna forget that, and I’m just gonna tell Hank a random number, and surely he’s not gonna count. And here we are. I’m at 11, and I’m halfway down. I’m counting pastas. I’m counting pastas in a vertical, pasticles, in a vertical slice. This is, Hank, this is 11. What are you seeing? What are you seeing? Look at mine, look over here. No, that’s noodle fracture. You’re seeing noodle fracture. You gotta look at the corners. This is. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Wait, hold on. Can we pause here? Can we pause at layer 7 and 8 right there? So what this actually is, is just a little bit of, it’s like a, what’s it called when tectonic plates slide over each other? Subduction. Subduction. These are two noodles that have subducted because if you think about it, you layer lasagna with the noodles flushed against each other, they absorb water, one’s gonna subduct. Okay, I can see that. So, if you look at the corners one, two, three, four, five six, seven, eight, nine, ten noodles and then one is hiding under the sauce. You’re right. All right, cool. Well, hey dig in. It’s science happened though. Science happened to the lasagna. Yes. First time I ever had a meal, that I was like, oh Like, this is what, this is what it’s all about. I was in Italy. I had lasagna at this little trattoria that you had to like walk downstairs to get into and it had like six tables. And I was like, oh. What have I been doing my whole life? Did it have a lot of layers? Did it have eleven or? It didn’t actually have a lot of layers, but I love a lot of layers. Same. This is the Americanization where it’s like, build it bigger! God, this is my ideal. What’s behind the corn dog? Oh, I just love corn dogs. I think that like, you hear it. First of all, amazing brand, right? Corn dog? Corn dog! It just rolls right off the palate, you know what I mean? We have a thing in Missoula, I don’t know where else it is called Viking. Have you ever heard of a Viking? No. It’s like a meatball corn dog. Like a long meatball, stick, corn dog. I’ve never heard of this. They deep fry the meat, the, wow. The cornbread, yeah. Eat the corn dog, eat the corn dog. I want to talk about more depressing things, but eat the corn dog. Do you smell the saffron? That’s a ridiculous hot dog. And I was gonna get, ooh, it’s spicy. This is a food I’ve never experienced before. And then the hot dog is very, special. This is just a special hot dog. It’s a special hot dog. And I think in life we need special hot dogs. Oh, that batter is so good. You made a video about an essay that you wrote. I’m sweating. In 1990 for predicting what would happen in 2020. You made some ish good guesses. And you also thought that, all diseases would be cured. We’d have alien technology. And now, what are your predictions for 2050? Great question. I think. That you’ll, on any day of the year, you will be able to see as far as every other day of the year in Los Angeles. So if you’re in like a nice spot with a nice view, there won’t be smog here anymore. The vast majority of power will be generated by solar, wind, geothermal, with maybe a pretty big slice coming from nuclear of some sort, hopefully even some fusion maybe. I think in 2050, we’ll, they will definitely be back to the moon. I think people will still die of cancer, but I think way more people will die with cancer than die of cancer. One of the things about curing diseases is that every, everything you make better in terms of health. increases the rate of cancer. The main risk factor for cancer is age. Yeah. So, every time you, like, every time you create a new cancer treatment, you don’t, like, decrease the number, the amount of cancer in the world. You probably increase the amount of cancer in the world. Yeah. Because it means 40 year olds aren’t dying and they’re living long enough to get cancer later. And. You just, like, If you ever see somebody brag. I follow a lot of nutrition stuff and people always say, well during this period where they didn’t eat meat, nobody died of cancer, and then you look at tuberculosis rates. Yeah. In that, and it’s like, well that was clipping them pretty quick. – Yeah. – So yeah. Yeah, they weren’t, weren’t getting up there. They didn’t have a chance to get cancer. Everybody should have a chance to get cancer. Yeah. You know? It’s, absolutely, like. Yeah Now there’s lots of problems to still solve, and like, the speed at which we do that is all very important, but, I am surprisingly optimistic about the, the like, like the future when you talk in that scale. It seems like people right now are maybe more scared than certainly that I’ve ever seen them in my lifetime, but it seems like even compared to previous generations, do you think that fear is warranted? I know that’s a loaded question. I think we know a lot, and I think we’re asked to care about everything sometimes, which I don’t think we should. Like, that’s a weird thing to say, like, you shouldn’t care about stuff, but you should care about stuff, but you should kind of pick. Yeah, yeah. Like, it’s like, the world’s very complicated and big, and to be like, I just don’t know what to do about the garbage patch. In the ocean. Like, I don’t know what to do about all these plastics in the ocean. I don’t know what that is and I’m not gonna. I mean, you can know what it is, but also know that if it’s a big deal, there are people working hard on it. Yep. And if you want, you can figure out who those people are and you can learn about them and you can learn about that topic and get deeper. But if you just start out with the bad news and then you move straight from that to the other bad news and then the other bad news and then the other bad news, and you never look at the people who are working really hard to try and actually solve those problems, then all you’re doing is. Like being in a boxing ring with an unbeatable opponent. Yeah. And that, that sounds awful, right? It sounds awful to like be getting in a boxing ring with a professional boxer and being like, are you gonna take it easy on me? And he’s like, no. Yeah. That’s what it feels like when my social media feed is like, would you like to see every single problem in a row? Yeah, I don’t know if I’ve ever explained this to, to our audience, but I had a really powerful moment when I started working here. We were talking earlier, I used to work in journalism, and I wrote a lot about a lot of the problems in agriculture and the food industry, of which there are many. I would write about the superbugs that could potentially take out our increasingly homogenized pig supply. They’re all Yorkshires! Bring on the Berkshires! But anyways, I would write about all this stuff constantly, and then I started working here, which was, you know, mostly silly, silly joke jokes. Yeah. And, I had a terrible mustache, and all the fans said, your mustache is the worst thing in the world. And I said, Well, raise $5,000 for No Kid Hungry, and I’ll shave it live. And they raised that within ten minutes. And we said, we already told No Kid Hungry it was a two week campaign! So, we raised the, we raised it to $10,000. They did that in an hour. I said $30,000, I will get a lower back tattoo, designed by Rhett and Link for No Kid I can pull it up, we got a mic back up, I’ll show you during the break, we’ll keep the cameras rolling. But, I raised 300,000 meals through No Kid Hungry for underserved kids and that was more, objectively, than I ever did of five years of doom and gloom writing that only made people mad. And I love journalists and it’s very, very important, but. Never underestimate the simple joy of making people happy. The thing that holds the people, like, the world together is people, like, caring what they, like, other people think about them. And caring and being thoughtful and caring about what happens to other people. And also themselves, like, we have to protect ourselves as well. And it’s 8 billion people on a pretty big planet, but like, not that big. And we, it like kind of works. Real estate agents would call it cozy. Quaint. It’s a fixer upper. A starter home ((Laughing)) ((Bells Ringing)) – [Josh] Hank, for your dessert course. We have a coffee peanut butter milkshake, a little bit of fresh coconut nibs on top. We have old fashioned chocolate chip cookies. A little bit of Maldon salt on the top. We have some Darjeeling black tea, right here. And then we have salmon candied, and you said, I love a meat dessert. – [Hank] I do love a meat dessert. You’re implying that there is something called a meat dessert that is recognized by everybody, in the general population. Well, you know what I mean. It’s a, it’s a dessert that’s made out of meat. No, it’s a meaningful term, but it implies that there’s a prior knowledge, of lots of meat desserts. Have you ever had orange chicken? Like, that’s meat dessert. Hank, have you been eating that after your entrée? Yeah, you should! I guess. Like, it’s like a little donut with meat in the inside. Yeah, you’re not wrong, though, is the thing. But that’s a lot of the Panda Express menu. Half that’s dessert then. Yeah, yeah. One of the first, like, fancy, fancy restaurants I ever went to was with my, like, my mom’s side of the family. I don’t know why or where we even were, but we went out to this and it was like, they had like a special room for us, cause there were so many of us, and they put us all in there, and then we ate food, and at the end of the meal, this fish came out. For dessert! What? Yeah! And I like, I was like, that doesn’t make any sense, and I put my fork in and I ate it, and I was like, that’s dessert! ((Laughing)) Like, I don’t know, it’s not what I, like, you don’t think it’s made out of protein, but like, it tastes like dessert. It was like flaky, and soft, and like, extraordinarily candy. That’s incredible. Yeah, so I want to try some candied fish. Can I pour you some tea? – Yes, please. – Do you take sugar? I do. All right. Tell me about the tea. This is just your general love of beverages? I drink, yeah, so I don’t drink coffee. I can’t handle the caffeine. I feel like tea has been a thing for so long. There has been time to perfect it. That was one of the things, two things that were on my list that I cut were sweet tea and fresh squeezed orange juice. We can do the director’s cut later. We can come back in a year and we’ll do the full. Yeah. Man, my last meal should have just been drinks! Cookies are a self explanatory. Can you take a cookie? This is maybe one of the best. Oh, my God, it’s so soft! It is soft and warm. My finger went through the bottom! ((Laughing)) That is what I’m talking about. We haven’t done anything better than that yet. Not like at the table, but as a species. I agree. This is where we’ve peaked. We should just cut off humanity now. We will get no better. Oh, that’s a lot of cookie dough. We have proof of the concept of the smaller cookies outside. And then it was Nicole’s executive decision, shout out to Nicole, that said four ounces. So these are quarter pound cookies. Oh my God. I’ll tell you, you get the wet in the middle. So wet. You asked people specifically when you were diagnosed to not send you, let’s call them alternative remedies and let you handle the care with your doctor. Why do you think people are so distrustful of institutional knowledge? Oh, well, not everybody is. But like, I think, I think there’s a bunch to it. So, like, one, there’s, like, it’s a mess out there. Like, the healthcare system is not great all the time. Yeah. Also a lot of treatments are unpleasant. Sure. And, you know, I think that, people are looking to their instincts sometimes, where it’s like, This can’t, this can’t, this doesn’t seem right. Like, this can’t be the way that things are supposed to go. There has to be something weird going on. Ultimately, like, the body is just very complicated and things go wrong. Have you ever even, like, looked at a diagram of your knee? Because, like, I’m 43 years old and my knees still work. That’s wild. Yeah. They’ve been knees for 43 years. Can you try to imagine, like, a car, 43 year old car with knees, still working? It’s like a, like a wheel. I can see that, you know, it’s just spinning, but like a whole knee. Like, look at a diagram of a knee sometime. Bring one, put a diagram of a knee. Look at that. Now bring back some layers. There’s more knee under there. There’s so much knee. And that’s the knee. It’s not even the complicated part. There’s too much knee per knee, I’d say. We need about 30 percent less knee, I think. Sometimes I think that might be good. But like, it can do all these things. It can twist, it can bend, it can go, like, it’s wild. Like, all this. The things that my mouth is doing right now, absolutely insane. When we asked you what you wanted to promote on this show, you had Study Hall. Yeah, yeah. And then you also just said chemotherapy in general, which that’s a first for guests. Yeah, nobody has, nobody’s like shouting out, I wanna, I wanna promote a really unpleasant treatment for a disease. Yeah. But yeah, no, I mean, I definitely had some people in my life and certainly on the internet who were like, you know, are you sure you want to go that route? And I’m like, yes. So, specifically with my cancer. Yeah. Absolutely. It’s really the only treatment and I, without it, I would be, on a very different path right now. Hank, if you went down that very different path. And you did die. Where do you go? Oh! What is consciousness? Did you figure it out? I was hoping that you had just figured it out in the car before you came here. Yeah, no thanks for asking. No problem. I think I, you know, to some extent I think it is for each of us to figure out on our own. I think that there’s a piece of that. I think that there’s a piece where it’s like okay to not know things. And like maybe some things aren’t meant to be super known. You know, the way I see things is gonna be different than the way other people see things. But like, Keanu Reeves said, like what happens when, when you’re, when you’re gone, he said. People will miss you very much. The people who love you will miss you. And I think that, I think that that like, that’s clever and that’s fun, but I think it’s also really true. Yeah. Like I think that that’s, Even the people that we don’t remember from our, of our ancestors, even people we aren’t, like, closely related to, like, all those people are in us in one way. Like, every word that I’m saying was made up by a person. Every idea that we have, like, is, is a combination of ideas that have come before and those ideas happened in people we don’t know. And, like, we’re, like, we’re all made up of each other. And that’s what, that’s, like, a thing that matters to me. I don’t know you as cancer guy, I know you as meat dessert guy now, Hank. I haven’t had any of my meat dessert yet. Eat the meat dessert. I’m going for the salmon belly. You can tell this is the belly from the striations. Yes, yes, yes. He can tell it’s the belly from the striations. I sure can. Oh, yeah. I could use a little more sugar on that. Yeah, I agree. Wow, you’re so strong. It’s all that bench press. It destroyed my body, Hank. It destroyed it. Oh, no. You ready to get in the lightning round? Oh, yeah, let’s do that. Let’s do it. Other than me, who’s the one person dead or alive you’d want to share your actual last meal with? Oh my wife. Well, you acted like there wasn’t, like, John, you know. I don’t know I mean, he’s great. Oren? Like, no one but? I mean at the moment, I think that if Oren was like 21 years old or something, then I’d really like that but like, right now. Not a great dinner guest. No. I mean, we’d be watching Minecraft YouTube. Oh, God. That is not the way that I want to go about this. No, I, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think, like, it’s, we’ve just got a lot more to say to each other, me and my wife. What song do you want playing at your funeral? All Star by Smash Mouth. Oh, man. God, that’s good. As a peace offering, what’s your favorite Dave Matthews song? Name a Dave Matthews song, is the actual question I’ve just been asked. That’s more of a command. There’s something about, no, because now it’s a challenge for me. There’s something about ants, right? It’s like Red Ant, or like Ant Farm? No. Alien Ant Farm did. Alien Ant Farm is definitely a band. Definitely a band. Oh my, God, just listened to that cover today. Anybody, Dave Matthews song, one. – [Crew Member] Crash. Crash! Thank you. That seems like a, that seems like a real Strawberry Pop Tart answer. What’s your biggest fear? That the cancer will come back. Like, the most present one. Do you have any, like, deeper ones? I’m worried that people don’t like me. Yeah, that’s fair. Well, I can’t give you any guarantees on the cancer. I really like you. I really enjoy your company. Your general oeuvre is great. Is butt legs? Butt is legs. What’s your greatest regret in life? Do you agree? I actually do for a very specific reason. I knew it. And. Wait, why do you know it? Do you know the reason? Well, I just feel like, you like think a lot about, food. So maybe there’s like a food reason. No, it’s a fitness reason. Oh, it’s a fitness reason. It’s a fitness reason. Okay. Because you have leg day, and you have not leg day. Butt is included in leg day. Yeah, yeah. But then from a food perspective, butt is shoulder. Yeah, but if you look, imagine a horse’s ass. I am. Where does the leg stop? At the end of the ham. It stops at the top of the horse. No, but I think if you, if you peel back the skin, if you flay it, except we’re talking about horse is very complicated. Now imagine a horse’s ass that’s been flayed. Correct. This is called butchery. I had to butcher a whole goat for a GMM episode. They gave it to me in a trash bag. I put it in the trunk of my Civic and I went home and I, what’s your greatest regret in life? What’s my greatest regret in life? Pretty easy one, actually. I mean, there was a time. When I thought I told a girl that she was having a nosebleed, but it was a mole. Yeah. So, I’d like to take that one back. That’s actually really great. Yeah. Really great answer. I hope she’s not watching. Sorry. We’re still friends. Finally Hank, are you happy? Oh, yes. I feel so lucky. I have such a weird fun life. I have such good people around me. I have, my son is so cool. My job is so cool. Yeah, I’m very happy. Well, I’m happy to have enjoyed this meal with you and to have finally been introduced to meat dessert. It’s gonna change my entire paradigm, Hank. Among all the paradigms you’ve already changed for me. But for real, thank you so much for coming on the show. Yeah. Oh, I’m gonna tell you to ask for your last words. Hank, I’m sorry, man. It’s Friday. I know how this show works and you don’t know how this show works. We’re going to the tiki bar after this. You’re gonna deliver your last words to that camera right there. That was fun. ((Laughing)) Thank you all so much for stopping by the Mythical Kitchen. We have new episodes out. Hank, you are bringing back Study Hall. Yeah! Study Hall is a program that lets you go from watching YouTube videos to getting actual, transferable college credit. Like, there’s a path to do that. Just to lower the barriers to maybe going back, getting some education, or starting your transition into higher ed. You can find out more about it at GoStudyHall.com Should I find, can I use it to finally graduate college? No, it’s more of a start out. That’s okay. Unless you need like, unless you need like some early credits that you don’t have. No, it’s a couple late ones. Can you just tutor me to help me finish college? If you want, I think you’re doing alright. I don’t know, we’ll figure it out. Anyways, I’ll see y’all next time. This is very fun. This is strange. Wait, wait, can you see it on camera? Oh, my God, I love it! What does it say? Oh. No kid hungry. Yeah, the sweat’s kinda running down, but, that’s. And also it’s a goat, cause a baby goat’s called a kid. – [Josh] Face the reality of mortality head on with our new Last Meals hat and tee, available now at Mythical.com