Category: Mythical Bits
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MB 129: How To: Have Better Posture
You’re sitting wrong. Pulling your shoulders back and lifting the top of your head increases blood flow, allowing your body to have better brain activity. But don’t stop there. Applying braces to both wrists can prevent carpal tunnel. Gently taping yourself to your chair will improve concentration and reduce your likelihood of slumping forward. Placing…
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MB 127: Can I Taste Yours?
Yours is nicer than I thought it would be. Well, yours is beautiful too. Actually mine looks pale compared to yours. Yeah, but mine has condensation on it. It’s kind of nasty. But your wife still eats yours? Every night. What about yours? Maybe once a year, she said the taste makes her gag. Yours…
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MB 126: That One Grocery Store Clerk
Ooh, soft batch cookies. My grandmother loved these. Last thing she ate before she died. Somehow she never went through menopause. She just kept flowing and flowing. My nipples get hard as rocks whenever a cloud comes up. You ever had your nipples bust through your apron? Gonorrhea. My testicles look just like walnuts. Oh,…
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MB 125: Every Podcast Ever
This episode is sponsored by Wet Pillow. Have you ever been lying awake at night because your pillow is just too dang dry? Well, then you might want to get Wet Pillow. Wet Pillow is a little bag of water that you pour on your pillow. You just open it up and pour it all…
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MB 124: Chase Is the Third Best Friend
I can’t imagine my life without these guys. They’re more than just bosses. They’re my best friends. You guys helped me grow, like that time that Rhett made me kiss him when I was dressed as a little prince. Got you back. I gave you little nibbles on your hand when I was dressed as…
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MB 123: I Pranked My Coworker
I’m pranking my co-worker by walking in our office with no clothes on. Going gray everywhere, huh?
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MB 122: You Will Never Guess…
You’ll never guess who I just ran into. Um… Was it the, uh… The wise old janitor from our elementary school who always knew exactly what to say when you weren’t really feeling up for going to school? And then there was that time in third grade when you were walking down the sidewalk and…
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MB 121: Bath Man?
I’m Back, man. Oh, we got some sort of like superhero thing we gotta do? What? Why are you dressed like Batman? Batman? You’re wearing a Batman costume. Bag man? Batman. Bath man? I mean, it is a cheap Batman costume. You don’t even have the shoe covers. I don’t even know what you’re- Excuse…
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MB 120: Best Invention of 2022
Are you tired of using your fingers like a boring average city slicker? Then spice things up with a Little Pocket Lasso. It’s simple. Just lasso a finger of your choice and make that finger do whatever you want. Yeehaw. Impress all your friends with that Southern charm. Pardon me. Hey moron, you cut me…